Category Archives: Newsletters

Note to self: Do it for no reason

This is #10 in my Note to self newsletters.  I post them here a few days later.  Feel free to sign up below.



This morning I got an email from the girlfriend of a dear friend of mine.  An ex-boyfriend of mine, in fact.  In the email she told me that my friend received news yesterday that he will have to have to open heart surgery.  His condition is grave if he doesn’t have the surgery.  She went on to tell me about his state of mind, that he is taking it in his stride and that he was brave telling his family.  Facts aside, she was reaching out to me so that I would reach out to him.  “You’re his family” she said,  “he would love to hear from you”.

And then, I lost it.  The word family and all the love that I have for him overwhelmed me to tears.  He was once my ex-boyfriend but lost that title a long time ago and is quite simply one of my closest friends.  We have always remained close but lately, ‘life’ has been getting in the way.  We’ve been ending our conversations without any concrete plans to catch up “you’ll have to come up and visit” he will say. “Yes, definitely, I’ll come up” I’ll respond and then we say our goodbyes and another month goes by.

Next month.  I’ll organize a time for next month I think.

But, he is my family (we always say to one another “I love you like a sister/brother) and with this news suddenly nothing mattered more than that.  I was also so grateful for his girlfriend to have the capacity and emotional intelligence to understand our connection.  It runs so much deeper than anything physical.

And, then I wondered.  Why did anything matter more than that fact?  Why did my job, why did my social life, why did the ‘right time’ – why did any of those things matter more?

Why do we put so much in the way of some connections, and not others?  Reward, I think.  In life, when there is nothing at stake but our personal time, we’re always weighing up what we’ll get out of it to what we’ll lose.

Later, I was on facebook and an acquaintance posted an old photograph of her mother with a message of her passing.  She thanked her for teaching her about love.  I felt sad for her but I felt this overwhelming feeling of connection to her pain, and then I left her message.  It’s the only time I’ve actually really reached out to her personally and, I felt sad that it was for this reason.  What reason did I need beforehand?

Shortly after, I opened the newsletter from one of my favorite bloggers & yogis’  Yeah Dave where he had just watched the inspiring video of Zach Sobiech.  Zach recently passed away from cancer.  He was 19 years old, but he left an incredible legacy for his family and friends, and a true message of how to live life for all of us..

I had watched the video the day after he passed, on May 20th, and was reduced to tears. Not from his passing but how beautifully he chose to live his life.

In the video Zach says “Don’t wait to know you’re going to die, before you learn to live”

Yes, and don’t we need to learn time and time again, how to live?

Earlier in the day my sister sent me a sweet picture of my nephew sleeping, face planted on his pillow, mouth agape; the book that he had been reading, and fell asleep to, was wide open.  I don’t know that I can love that boy enough and it filled me up this morning and, you guessed it; Tears.

On any given day this is the undulation of life; fear, loss, opportunity, tenderness, loneliness, connection, joy. And, we manage our emotions accordingly.  But, I wonder, what is it we are really managing?  Our time, our losses, our pride, in convenience…..?

In Dave Rominelli’s newsletter today he talked about emotions, and that they are what awaken the soul.  I believe that.  When we truly allow ourselves to openly feel our emotions; to shed a tear, for loss or for love.  When we let go enough to laugh uncontrollably, to cry without apology, to dance ecstatically, to be the truest expressions of ourselves whether that be loud or soft.  When we give ourselves over to a deeper connection with someone else doesn’t it only reflect back to us what we have to offer the world?  And, shouldn’t this then, become the point of our lives?  Isn’t this the way we should all commit to living?

I’m really asking.

You know, we can’t beat death, or loss but let us at least embrace our life and the connection we have to it through the people we have around.
And, let us stop waiting to have a reason to do so.
On June 15th, I am doing my best to help the fight against cancer.  I am coming together with my yoga community and committing to 8 hours of yoga to raise money for the St. Jude Research hospital.  If you don’t know anything about this hospital, you should.  They provide care for children with cancer and accommodation for their families at no cost!
I will be practicing and teaching for the entire day to raise awareness and money for this incredible organization.  My goal is $1500.  I’ve raised $45 so far so, I’ve got a bit to go but I’m confident with your help, I can do it.
I believe we have to be as aggressive with our research as cancer is with our kids lives…..

Visit my St. Jude webpage here  The money goes straight to the hospital.

You can follow:


Want to guest blog?  
I would love you to be my guest and get your voice on over here.  Please email with any suggestions or a conversation at

Note to self: Don’t run too fast

This is #9 in my Note to self newsletters.  I post them here a few days later.  Feel free to sign up below.                                  My grandfather and I on my recent trip home to Australia One of my most favorite stories my grandfather tells is of the day he had organized to catch a train from one Victorian country town to another. His father, my great-grandfather, worked on the railways at the time and held quite a respected position.  One day my grandfather needed to get to a town that, unfortunately, didn’t have a train… Continue Reading

Note to self: Be open to letting someone in

This is #8 in my Note to self newsletters.  I post them here a few days later.  Feel free to sign up below.   I wasn’t in Boston, or even in the country when the bombings happened but, I was present.  I was also aware of the other tragedy happening around the missing young Brown student; Sunil Tripathi and the sensational story of him being accused of being one of the bombers, Imagine the jagged trail of emotions and wild moving thoughts his friends and family must have experienced through all of this “our loved one is alive but he’s a terrorist!?” Obviously this was not the case and, once… Continue Reading

Note to self: Symmetry is for suckers

This is #7 in my “note to self” newsletters I send out  For most of the time I was in India I wore black flip flops.  Which, considering I had to take my shoes off before entering any establishment, it was basically like traveling with black luggage and the likely-hood of someone taking off with my chappals was about the same chance Lindsay Lohan had of getting another DUI.So, when I was a week away from leaving India and still in possession of my two black flip flops, I was feeling lucky.  Blessed even.  They had been left, late night, in front of outdoor parties and busy restaurants and on the side… Continue Reading

Note to self: Who’s your Guru now Biatch!

Note to self: Who’s your Guru now Biatch!

This is #6 in my ‘Note to self’ newsletter series I send out spontaneously.   About a year ago a dear friend from Australia and I were catching up in a phone conversation.  We were laughing about the absurdities of life, as we do, and he was having a field day with the fact that I was teaching yoga. Australian humor, if you aren’t aware, is the practice of taking what is presented and basically looking for as many possible, offensive ways to twist it until it borders on, what can feel like, an insult.  The point is that you just don’t take yourself too seriously.  The beauty is that… Continue Reading

Note to self: Something will happen

Note to self: Something will happen

This is #5 of the Note to self: Newsletters I send out randomly. Sharon Salzberg, a well-known and highly respected meditation teacher in the U.S., likes to use travel as metaphor for life.  It makes sense because, when we travel, it’s basically like we are unsuspectingly paying for the privilege of our lives to be completely out of our hands.  We’re at the mercy of schedules, weather and other people’s inconvenient habits, needs, fears and pathological weirdness, and there is very little we can do to control it.  Which, essentially, is life in a nutshell.Shit’s going to happen and the only thing you can do about it, is manage your response.She said,… Continue Reading

Newsletter #4: Presence means intimacy with What is.

“Presence means intimacy with What is” It’s officially Christmas throughout the world, so talk of presents is ripe.  I spent Christmas Eve in the company of good friends and their family.  It was truly delightful in a way that, only a few years ago, would have been met with apprehension and disdain by me.  Tonight, however, I was at a table full of cracked and flying lobster shells, warm butter sauce, good wine and squeals of anticipation for Santa’s arrival (is 36 too old to squeal?) I haven’t ever been a Christmas kind of person.  At least not when I became old enough to know better.  And, certainly not when… Continue Reading

Newsletter #3: Note to self: It’s a working title

Note to self: It’s a working title. I’ve been using working title’s a lot lately, mostly for my writing, and I was trying to think of a smart and witty working title for this newsletter and I couldn’t, so I got obvious. Then I got to thinking about how great a working title is and now, you see, the working title has become the title because it has become the subject for this little intro rant. The best thing about a working title is that it’s purely based on instinct, and there is no pressure to keep it.  You simply use the first thing that comes to mind with the intention that… Continue Reading

Newsletter #2 Note to self: Find a binder full of men

I could do a lot with a binder full of men…..just saying I’m moving out of my apartment at the end of the month and I’ve noticed that I have thrown away any routine I once had to keep any semblance of tidy in my home, and healthy in my body.  Basically, I am doing the bare minimum to keep me out of squalor and ward off obesity or liver damage. Keeping balance in times of transition, I realize, is futile.  I might as well stare in front of the mirror each morning and repeat over and over again what a failed human being I am – because it’s basically… Continue Reading

Newsletter #1 Note to self: I love writing notes to self

A note to self: I love writing notes to self! Hi Well, it’s been a good month in these new digs now and it’s really starting to feel like home.  Home is such a transient feeling isn’t it?  At least for me it is.  Even in a brick and mortar style home I have resided in for years, I still have moments of feeling unsettled or like I need to tread lightly in certain corners.  After all these years, I think I’ve come to accept the fact that I will often be the adulterous partner in my relationship with home.  At some point, I’ll want a new one. But, here… Continue Reading